I had a thought which I wanted to share. I was pondering over the things which prevent a person from changing for the better. Unfortunately, some people experience tests and times of ease yet do not change their character in a positive way. Even though, there are many possible causes only one will be discussed in this blog.
In some cases, people do not change for the better because the people around them do not encourage them to do so. In fact, many people have this habit of only patting others on the back and telling them what they want to hear. They somehow believe that this is the character of a good companion and friend. They falsely believe acting in this way is a sign of their deep love and respect for others. But this is completely incorrect as this behaviour only encourages one to continue with their attitude without improving it. There is nothing wrong with providing emotional comfort to others but a good friend will always kindly point out the ways in which their friend or relative can improve their character. This will in fact improve the quality and condition of their companion’s life in this world and in the next. While merely patting others on the back will only provide temporary comfort to them but in no way will it improve the situation or their character. The correct attitude is possible to achieve without disrespecting others. This is the duty of a person towards others, especially their relatives. In reality, if a person’s friend or relative dislikes their good advice then they do not value their relationship with them. A person should never let anything, such as a person’s age, prevent them from speaking the truth and kindly advising them to change their attitude for the better. Even if it is one’s own parents they should still fulfil this duty as this behaviour is treating them kindly. Simply staying quiet just because they are one’s parents should not be the attitude of a person unless they know advising them will only lead to further problems for everyone.
A shoulder to cry on is only really useful when it leads to a person changing for the better. Even if a person’s attitude in a particular situation is correct none the less there are always lessons they can learn from the situation, which should be pointed out to them by others.
To conclude, one must advise others to do good and turn away from evil and not only provide emotional support by simply patting others on the back. Chapter 5 Al Ma’idah, verse 2:
“…And cooperate in righteousness and piety, but do not cooperate in sin and aggression…”
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