The last blog was discussing the importance of good companionship within marriage.
The following is a summary of most of the advice given in this blog series so far. It was initially given to a woman but it has been edited so that it applies to both husbands and wives.
If a muslim behaves as the Earth and supports their spouse at all times then their spouse will become the sky for them by sheltering them from harm. If a muslim gives peace of mind and body to their spouse then in return they will become a pillar of financial, mental and physical support for them. If a muslim strives to keep their spouse happy within the laws of Islam then they will find that their spouse in turn does the same. If they respect and honor their spouse they will receive the same. Meaning, what one gives is what they will receive.
A muslim should be modest and only speak and act in a way which pleases Allah, the Exalted, and their spouse. They should be content with their marriage and what they possess as this is true richness and happiness. It is quite evident if one observes the media that fame and fortune does not bring happiness. In fact, the majority of celebrities end up divorced despite their fame and fortune. A muslim should ensure they should adorn themself for their spouse while avoiding extravagance and waste as this is an aspect of maintaining the love they share. One should always be aware of the mood of their spouse and speak and act appropriately as arguments can occur even if the right thing is said at the inappropriate time for example, when one is hungry or tired. A muslim should appreciate the value of money and not waste it as this is disliked by Allah, the Exalted, and disliked by a God fearing spouse. The married couple should give top priority to educating themselves in religious matters and ensuring their children gain a good education in both worldly and religious matters. This education will strengthen the bond between them. A muslim should try to fulfill the reasonable requests of their spouse as long as it does not challenge the commands of Allah, the Exalted. As constantly denying one’s spouse can lead to anger and arguments. Anything which occurs between them should be kept secret as revealing secrets can fracture the trust between a married couple. The only exception is when one seeks the advice of another but even then it should not become a public matter and should not be spread to too many people. A muslim should within limits try to mirror the emotions of their spouse for example, they should not be openly happy when their spouse is sad as this can make a person believe their spouse does not care about their feelings. A muslim should learn to sacrifice and compromise for the sake of their spouse within the limits of Islam as this will cause their spouse to strive to keep them pleased. A good way to remember all this is that a muslim should treat their spouse in the same way they would like their beloved to be treated by their spouse. For example, a husband should treat his wife the same way he would like his son-in-law to treat his daughter. Or a wife should treat her husband the same way she would like her daughter-in-law to treat her son. Adopting this mentality alone would be enough to solve countless problems within marriage.
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