Another aspect of raising pious children is not to admonish them publicly. It is best to do this privately as a child may feel embarrassed when this is done in front of others including their siblings. Embarrassment and anger are two traits which can prevent a person, especially a child, from accepting the advice. Both often occur when a person is publicly admonished.
In some cases, punishing children is required in order to develop good character. But this punishment should always be mild not violent as this is the tradition of the Holy Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, according to a Hadith found in Sunan Ibn Majah, number 1984. The mild punishment should be more concentrated on things such as temporarily taking away their privileges for example, taking away their game console. A harsh punishment can lead to bad character and may even inspire them to harm others when they are angered.
A child should not be pampered excessively as this can lead them to adopt a superiority complex whereby, they expect others to always accept their opinion and way. This can be disastrous for them especially, when they become adults and face other aspects of life such as work and marriage. A child should be provided with the essentials and given gifts on special occasions especially, to encourage them to work harder in school and their Islamic studies.
Parents should not encourage their children to become lazy. This occurs especially, amongst Asian households, where the parents specifically the mother will perform all the household chores for her children even though they are physically able to do them themselves such as, fixing their bed in the morning. This only develops laziness and prevents them from adopting a disciplined life. This again will cause great problems for them in future years such as marriage. Many divorces occur simply because a husband or a wife refuse to do simple household chores and instead expect their spouse to do it just like their parents done for them during their childhood.
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