I read a news article a while ago, which I wanted to briefly discuss. It reported on a prominent figure in society who decided to take a step back from the role which came with being a member of his family. It seemed as though he was forced to decide whether to be an active member and fulfil this role fully or to completely be cut off from it and his family.
Unfortunately, this type of attitude is extremely common amongst muslims, especially the Asian community. They often give extreme ultimatums to their relatives meaning, they are either with them or completely cut off from them. This contradicts the teachings of Islam, as they base their reaction on their own feelings and desires instead of the teachings of Islam. For example, if a son wants to marry someone who is lawful in Islam for him to marry but as the parents dislike his choice, they give him an ultimatum; he either chooses not to marry her or if he does, they will cut ties with him. This behaviour completely contradicts the teachings of Islam. It is strange how these people do not understand that they are the ones who will grieve over the outcome more than anyone else. And even if they claim to be completely pleased with cutting ties with their relative, it is undoubtedly a major sin. In fact, it is such a severe sin that the Holy Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, warned in a Hadith found in Sahih Bukhari, number 5984, that the one who severs the ties of kinship will not enter Paradise. In fact, Allah, the Exalted, severs ties with the one who behaves in such a manner, which prevents them from being content with their incorrect decision. This has been indicated in a Hadith found in Sahih Bukhari, number 5987. A muslim should therefore only turn away from the decision of their relatives or friends if it is unlawful. If it is lawful but they disagree with their choice, they should kindly express their opinion but if the person decides to go ahead with their choice, they should accept this and maintain ties with them and fulfil their rights according to the teachings of Islam. They should continue supporting them and never insult them if their choice ends up being a bad one. It is important to remember people are not perfect. This will ensure the relatives or friends continue maintaining ties and respecting each other. This is a duty all muslims must fulfil.
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