I had a thought, which I wanted to share. People often confuse the things which they have no power over with the things they have control over and are responsible for. As a result of this confusion, they fail to adopt the correct mentality and behaviour thereby missing out on obtaining the peace of mind which Islam offers. Instead, their confusion causes them to adopt an unbalanced mental and physical state which causes them to swing from one extreme mood to another in a short space of time, which results in mental disorders, such stress, anxiety and depression.
One must understand certain things in order to avoid this outcome. There are two elements in one’s life. The first are the things which are external and they have no control over them, such as falling sick. These things are connected to destiny and the divine will and cannot be averted or avoided. The second element is internal and is linked to one’s behaviour. This element a person has complete control over and is what they will be judged on by Allah, the Exalted.
The confusion occurs when one fails to understand that they have control over their behaviour and are responsible for it, and as a result they fail to adopt a balanced state of mind whereby they do not become overly happy meaning, exultant, in times of ease and overly sad, meaning, grief, in times of difficulties. Instead, they fail to adopt control over their behaviour and instead treat it as if it is out of their control and a part of destiny, just like the external situations they face. As a result of failing to control themselves, they become exultant over insignificant things and extremely upset over insignificant and petty issues. Whenever they recover from their extreme behaviour they simply shrug their shoulders and comment that such is life and that is the way it is. As a result, they do not improve their behaviour with time, nor learn from their experiences, as they do not take responsibility for their behaviour and instead place it with the things they have no control over. This is an incredibly rude and foolish attitude to adopt as one blames Allah, the Exalted, the One who decides destiny, for their bad behaviour and attitude, even though their behaviour is fully under their control.
When one adopts this attitude they will come to believe that swinging from one extreme mood to another is simply a norm in this world and that is how life was supposed to be lived. This is closer to a mentally unstable person’s lifestyle than a balanced Muslim’s life, a balance which Islam teaches.
To conclude, one must avoid confusing what they do not have control over with what they have full control over i.e. their behaviour and attitude. By differentiating between the two, a Muslim can and will learn from their experiences and with the support of Islamic knowledge, they will adopt a balanced state of mind whereby they avoid extreme moods. This leads to peace and mind in this world. Chapter 57 Al Hadid, verses 22-23:
“No disaster strikes upon the earth or among yourselves except that it is in a register, before We bring it into being – indeed that, for Allāh, is easy. In order that you not despair over what has eluded you and not exult over what He has given you…”
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